I sucked a dick the way you fall asleep, slowly and then all at once.

cumsock:

put this sticker on my ass

cumsock:

put this sticker on my ass

(via serionsly)

Notes
13914
Posted
6 hours ago
johnentwinkle:

I just ran into Keith Richards, what a man

johnentwinkle:

I just ran into Keith Richards, what a man

(via flamboyantjesus)

Notes
2340
Posted
6 hours ago
wtfeveridgaf:

jumpingbutnotforjoy:

Goth

Out of every pun and play on words I’ve seen on this site, this is the one that makes me so unreasonably angry.

wtfeveridgaf:

jumpingbutnotforjoy:

Goth

Out of every pun and play on words I’ve seen on this site, this is the one that makes me so unreasonably angry.

(Source: lysergicyugen, via thestartrekunicorndog)

Notes
114462
Posted
6 hours ago

darlingwalker:

i want to achieve “she’s adorable and i will protect her at all costs but also i am slightly frightened by her power”

(via your-hair-is-dry)

Notes
46210
Posted
13 hours ago

overlypolitebisexual:

cat people: dogs are cool too
dog people: cats don’t feel love did you know a cat once MURDERED my MOTHER

(via mybatchesarecumbered)

Notes
108117
Posted
13 hours ago

vivacosima:

cat: places paw tentatively on boob
me: please–
cat: presses paw down on boob
me: don’t–
cat: slowly, agonizingly walks across boobs

(Source: majesdanes, via thejapanesespirit)

Notes
54450
Posted
13 hours ago

nicolasandthecage:

do you realize that it takes 3 sheep to make one sweater???? amazing i didn’t even know they could knit

(Source: 4titty, via mybatchesarecumbered)

Notes
315373
Posted
13 hours ago

forever:

why do teachers think that yawning is rude like i’m oxygen deprived what do u want me to do

(via mybatchesarecumbered)

Notes
67587
Posted
13 hours ago

devilfruits:

Do you ever look at 9 year olds and just know they’re gonna be a fuckin douche in 6/7 years.

(Source: losingsodas, via mybatchesarecumbered)

Notes
617075
Posted
13 hours ago

humorprince:

ivorycalifornia:

i told my mom i was gonna exercise and she laughed at me

 

(Source: sorryugh, via mybatchesarecumbered)

Notes
135860
Posted
13 hours ago

condom:

don’t send me snapchats from something i wasn’t invited to you rude ass bitch

(via mybatchesarecumbered)

Notes
315466
Posted
13 hours ago
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